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Aseasonal Sadness

by Frankie Master

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1.
Writing stories in my head of what you’re doing where you live It’s comforting to place you in my mind Soaking pillows in my bed How is it that you sleep knowing The sadness that you’ve sown into my life? You say that you can’t stand To see me, ‘cause it hurts too bad You say you’d never do Something if it don’t make sense to you I guess this made sense, to toss me to the wind All the sense in the world, to never see me again But who am I to judge? Coming up on 1.5 But still I turn down white pines drive Hoping for a heart beat in blue light They say just give it half the time To mourn the loss, well I’ll need 5 For 10 thought the good guy never dies You said to never stop Dreaming ’til I get what I want You said that you were lost I hope you found your cause And that this made sense To toss me to the wind All the sense in the world To never see me again But how am I to judge? Didn’t I run? [x4] I guess this made sense, to toss me to the wind All the sense in the world, to never see me again
2.
Pathos 04:09
Flowers everywhere Do you notice, do you care? Do you know I’ve been crying at night? Sunlit window sill Shades closed, for the bill Was it always this quiet outside? Salted sidewalks for no one to glide Maybe we’ll just let it burn ’Til it loses oxygen on its own Maybe we’ll just give it time No need to explode These things come and go Lost on your way No one prepped you for the day That you’d have to say who you are Searching for a cause Landed on the one Strap it on to your dress and go to war Type it under your name and spread the word Maybe we don’t need to read We don’t need to believe in anything Who’s got the time, we’re all up in the night Traumatized, insane Drift off again…
3.
Eden 03:04
Twenty-one, never been loved the right way Only got a few hours left in this place So you and I lay down And we don’t get up Grass stains on the only jeans that fit me Lower ground curved where the Earth allowed us to be So you and I we sink in too deep Days go by, and we never move Weeks go by, we see flowers bloom Months go by, and we watch them die Years go by, we’re still side by side A lifetime
4.
All I want is a moment To remember your eyes All I need is a minute To think about your smile In an hour I’ll stop crying In the morning I’ll be fine In a week I won’t remember In a month I’ll be alright But for now if I can hold on to this time Maybe I can hold on to you All I miss is your shoulder And laying with you in bed Having someone who cared about All the thoughts in my head Maybe someone else will make me laugh the way you did But for now, all I can feel is the hole you left I trusted you would last All is wish is that you would see All you’re throwing away with me All I pray is that you would be At my door with your heart on your sleeve And I would hold my breath Turn my bones to wax Fill my lungs up with smoke, mirrors, roses, hope Spin your dust to gold
5.
Willow 04:09
The sky is falling, but you wear nylon The wind is howling, but you’ve got headphones So you can’t hear the ring And you don’t feel a thing And I know that I need to outgrow Praying for a storm But when the power goes out I like how the flames keep me warm I never dreamt of a long white gown I dreamt of living on a big white cloud Though my legs would shake I would be so great So I listened closely And wore all my pencils down I walked into bright red houses Knowing they might burn down oooooooooohs
6.
Do you feel me in the night? Do you see me when you close your eyes? Do you miss me, in the day? When the sun is high and the temp’s just right, do you? ‘Cause I do, yeah I do, all I do is think of you Was it nothing, all that time? Did I simply keep you occupied? Was I stupid? Did you lie? How does one just simply change their mind Like you did, but you did, all you did was change your mind Did you mean it when you said That you knew someday I’d be something? That it was cosmic, ever true That you believed in me and I believed in you Like we did, ‘cause we did, not a dream was dreamt too big I bathed in the spotlight of your eyes Grew six inches under your sky Even your shadow commanded a room I felt beautiful with you So when the ground began to divide, it tore us apart to opposite sides The color seeped out of my skin I was left right where I began But I’m falling in love again Feeling the light on my skin Ripples of blue morph into me Echoes of you fade out I’m free
7.
Sakura 04:45
Landlord called, said he’d be by to show my place to someone who can better afford it they’ll take my lease in may So i’ll pack up my things and i’ll move again done it so many times it’s the back of my hand February’s supposed to be short but it’s longer than ever before twenty-five and i’m supposed to be sure but my walls are made of cardboard need to learn how to let go when it’s time I miss people i didn’t love and places I never liked Ponyboy don’t you know that nothing gold can stay it’s aseasonal, the sadness I never minded rain I’m a droplet in the wind Time goes by but I’m still where I’ve always been Lose my mind to find myself, change my plans Click my heels so hard they’re bleeding ruby red Crying Eden, take my hand I’m blue, I’m gray, I’m thin So I’ll pack up my things and i’ll move again done it so many times it’s the back of my hand I’m a blossom in the spring

credits

released June 16, 2023

Produced by Jake Hawyrlak
Mixed by Nat Harvie & Doug Saltzman
Mastered by Doug Saltzman

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Frankie Master Chicago, Illinois

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